Living with Parents You Don’t Know Well


      Some students from other countries who come to the U.S. are having a new experience living with parents who left them many years earlier. For some, the experiences are difficult.
      Parents who want to give their children a better future sometimes leave their children behind when they come to this country.
      For children, living without their parents is hard. And for some living with their parents again after they were separated seems harder.

      Veronica, a junior at Blair, came to the U.S. about two years ago. Veronica and her brothers were left by her mom in El Salvador when they were little. “She didn’t do it because she didn’t care for us,” Veronica said. “She did it because she needed to.”
      Veronica was seven when her mom came to this country. Veronica lived without her mom for 9 years. Time passed and her mom could not see how Veronica and her brothers were changing.
      Now, Veronica is 19, and things have changed. “My mom still thinks we are the little kids she left behind,” Veronica said. Her mom missed all those years when her children were growing from children to teenagers. “She doesn’t think we’ve changed,” Veronica said.
      Santiago is a junior at Blair. He’s been in the U.S. for almost two years. Santiago’s mom came here when he was 3. Santiago lived with his father in Honduras until he was 12.
      When Santiago was 12, his father came to live to the U.S., too. Santiago lived 6 years by himself. But he was receiving money from his mom and dad, but mostly from his mom.
      Because Santiago’s mom left when he was very little, he didn’t know his mom. Therefore they have never had a good relationship.
      Now Santiago is 18. He lives with his mother and brothers. His mom doesn’t expect Santiago to be a kid, like he was when she left him. “My mom understands I’m not a child anymore,” Santiago said.
      Santiago didn’t have any expectation about what his life with his mom would be like. His mom works most of the time and even though they live together, he barely sees her. “I would like my mom to spend more time with me,” Santiago said.
      Santiago spends his holidays with his father, who has never changed since he’s come to this country. His father is the same way he was with Santiago in Honduras.
      Every case is different, and the ways of dealing with them are different, too. Veronica and Santiago don’t expect life to be easy for them, but they are willing to work hard so that they can have a better future. “I have a goal in mind and if it is my own will, then I will not stop working until it becomes true,” Veronica said.

© Copyright Silver International Newspaper, Montgomery Blair H.S. 2006 (This page was created by Cindy Ayala)